The Lure of Blood

City of Edmonton Skyline

The amazing skyline in that photograph is my home, Edmonton, Alberta. I’ve lived here all my life and experienced many things; some good, some bad, some exciting, some mundane. Edmonton is a blue-collar city with a small town attitude and a big heart. I have seen this city pull together so often to combat some outrage or open their hearts and wallets to help someone in need. We are a caring city and I’m proud this is my home.

Which is why I’m so baffled by the Best Gore website.

I get that people are fascinated by the many ways we humans can destroy things. I’m a huge horror movie buff myself and was singing Alice Cooper lyrics in elementary school, much to the dismay of my teachers. That isn’t the problem. Alice Cooper, horror movies, Marilyn Manson, all of that is fantasy. It’s no more real than the Coyote from Bugs Bunny getting another anvil on his head. Best Gore is real.

The owner of the Best Gore website lives in Edmonton. So let’s look at the sequence of events concerning the Luka Magnotta video that appeared on his website. Magnotta creates the video, uploads it to the website, Mark Marek (the owner of Best Gore) sees it and calls police (according to him), Marek posts said video on his website. Huh?

Okay. Let’s assume Marek was concerned enough to alert the police about this video, which is a fact I am seeing conflicting information about and I have not been able to get in touch with Marek. Should that change, I will post his statements later. Getting back to this issue at hand, though, Marek was concerned enough to get the police involved or to cooperate with the police. He then posts the video that concerned him enough to his website? WTF?

Marek, so far, has said nothing substantial about his actions. He only states that he serves the public and puts the truth out there. I’d love to know what public he’s serving. There are graphic images of car accidents, animal encounters and assorted other depravities that it’s no wonder Magnotta posted there. I’ve got to ask myself, though, who goes to this site? Who on earth needs or wants to see this stuff?

Maybe, just maybe, an emergency personnel is using the site for training purposes. In a stretch I could see that. Who else? Let me say, if you’re visiting this site for yucks and giggles, you’re one sick fucker. What? “Saw” isn’t enough for you anymore? Now we have to create things like this site or the movie “The Human Caterpillar” to amp things up? Do we really need that?

Let’s put this into perspective. Imagine you’re the mother or father or brother or sister of Jin Lun. Let’s imagine Lun added love and laughter to your life. Let’s imagine Jin Lun in your life as a vital and integral part of your life. Now imagine him ripped away from you in a brutal and horrific manner. You’re Jin Lun’s mother and the child you carried in your belly for 9 months, fed, clothed, cleaned, played with, argued with, loved, watched sleep, sang to and watched grow has been brutally tortured and murdered. His last hours being ones of pain and fear. You’re Jin Lun’s father and you know there was nothing you could do to help save your son, the boy you taught to fish or to sing or read to at night or listened to at the dinner table or made pancakes with in the morning. He’s gone and you couldn’t help him. Let that image rip at your soul for a few minutes.

Now imagine it being posted on the Internet for the world to see.

Now tell me, Mr. Marek, how you were serving truth and you make no apologies for posting it. Now justify even owning a site like yours. Go ahead and scoff now. Isn’t it hilarious, Mr. Marek?

I’ve seen the site and it disgusts me. There is absolutely no truth or higher good a site like this serves. If it could be justified. If there was a purpose I’d leave it alone. There isn’t. For my part, I will be boycotting this website. It’s not much, but maybe if one person refuses to give this site any attention, maybe others will, too. Maybe then Marek will see that videos like these aren’t “truth” and aren’t serving any purpose.

Mr. Marek, you owe Jun Lin’s family an apology.

The Scary Lady

Danielle Smith Boob Bus

I suffer from night terrors. Night terrors differ from nightmares in that when you wake up, you don’t fully come out of the dream. So, you wake up and the monster you’ve been running from is now there in your bedroom. Not fun. In these dreams things start out innocuous enough; things look normal until the family you’ve been having dinner with decides you’re very tasty. This whole Danielle Smith campaign has been a little like that for me.

Smith is charismatic. She can sure talk and she looks pretty on the side of a bus (by the way, how on earth did that slip by her office?). Let’s face it, she talks better than Ralph Klein ever did and looks better than Stelmach. So much so she slipped this whole “conscience rights” things past me. I didn’t pay attention to it at all. I was so busy listening to the promises of payouts and improved health care that I missed this one. Like David Copperfield, Smith has an amazing ability to get her audience to watch what is happening in the right hand while her left is doing the pickpocketing.

Let’s look at this whole “conscience rights” thing for a moment. I first heard of it when Warren Kinsella of the Toronto Sun wrote about it in his article, “Smith Changes Her Tune and Is Completely Off-Key”. Wait a minute. I don’t usually watch the news and such, but come election time I do keep up with the politics. I love the Internet for giving me that ability. So how did a journalist in Toronto click into this and make noise about it before Alberta journalists did? To be fair, perhaps there was an article or two that I missed. Still, he’s in Toronto writing about Alberta politics and drawing attention to where it needs to be focused. You’re being ripped off, people and Kinsella is showing you.

Conscience rights, as I understand it, means that if an official does not agree with a particular issue and it conflicts with his job, he does not have to perform that function. So, let’s explain that. Let’s suppose there is a judge that does not agree with gay marriage. That judge does not have to perform the marriage. What? If there is a doctor who does not agree with abortion, he does not have to perform the abortion. Now, if you’re a judge who does not agree with gay marriage, you tend to stay away from marrying people. A doctor who does not agree with abortions would probably go into another field. No problem there. Right? Let’s take this one step further; let’s suppose you’re a prison official who does not agree with gay rights. Does that mean that official no longer has to care for them? Let’s say you’re an apartment manager who does not agree with the swinger lifestyle. Guess what? You don’t have to rent to “them” any more. Restaurant manager who doesn’t agree with First Nations’ rights? Don’t serve them. Welcome to the slippery slope, people.

Yes, some of the examples I’m showing are extreme, however, do you really believe there aren’t those who won’t go there? I’m a Wiccan and once lost a job because of it. No, that wasn’t the official reason, but was something that was said from my manager to me on my way out. She later denied saying it. Who is easier to believe? I have met racists, skinheads, gaybashers, and religious nuts; all of whom believe that “those” people should be grateful for what they got. I actually met a man who once said, “Rosa Parks should have stayed at the back of the bus. Then we wouldn’t have all these problems.” They’re out there and this policy gives them a blank cheque.

Okay. Those people do exist. What about the woman who really believes that shielding her children from swingers and Wiccans is best for her kids? I have to ask, what do these people think will happen if they meet a swinger couple? That the couple will start indoctrinating a five year old? “Yes, Billy. Your Mommy and Daddy are going to hell because they only sleep with each other.” Do these people believe that Wiccans will steal their 10 year old to perform a “Drawing Down of the Moon”? Do they think gays will infect their children? Come on. Let’s get real here. I’m all for raising kids right, but not when that means they get the idea that stomping all over the rights of those who are different is okay.

I did try to contact Danielle Smith’s office. I was a good girl and sent an email via their website. That’s a nice way of doing it. I can be polite when I try. That was a week ago. They never responded. So, when I called Smith’s office today the alarm bells really rang. I first called her campaign office and was told that the website email goes to her “other” office (they never really explained what the other office was). So, I called there and tried to get someone in the media office. No answer. I hate leaving messages. Besides, they’ve had a week to respond. So I got ahold of the receptionist who stated that the office “wasn’t sure where that email is routed to.” WHAT?? Let me get this right; you have an email for constituents (and nuts like me) to get ahold of you but you don’t know where it’s going? There’s a unique solution. Don’t want to have to answer questions? Create an email link and dump the email into the ether. Then you can honestly say, “nope. Didn’t get your email.” Does anyone else find that hilarious?

All I can do is write this blog, send a letter to the editor of local papers and cross my fingers. I won’t be voting for Smith, I can tell you that much and I urge others to do the same. Yes, the flash and dazzle is pretty, but all that gets annoying after a while. Then, when reality sets in, we’re left with “conscience rights”. I’m awake, but the night terror goes on and the monster is in my room.

300 Too Many

A while ago I came across Dan Savage’s “It Gets Better” project. Although I haven’t uploaded a video, I have watched many videos people have done and applauded them. I was the victim of bullying in school. Not because I was openly pansexual, but because I was simply different. Even now adults think it’s all right to poke fun at that difference. It doesn’t bother me as much now, but I am aware of it.

Today I watched Rick Mercer’s video, “Rick’s Rant – Teen Suicide“. In it he tells adults, both straight and GLBT, that telling kids it gets better isn’t enough. That something needs to be done to stop the bullying. In it he says that 300 kids committing suicide from bullying per year is 300 too many.

I agree.

When I worked for Alberta Government, Alberta Education, I raised the question of bullying. I asked what was being done to stop it. Nothing, I was told. It isn’t a government concern. I went to the bathroom and quietly cried. If it isn’t a government concern, who’s is it? When we see the kid being bullied, when we hear about it, when we witness it, who’s concern is it? When a child kills himself and tears his family and friends apart because of bullying, why aren’t charges laid?

As an adult, if I am harassed (when you’re over 18 it’s no longer bullying, it’s harassment), I can go to the police and get help. I can go to the courts and make that person leave me alone. If I’m a teenager and I’m bullied, I can go to teachers. I can go to the principal. I can go to my parents, but what happens? Often the schools claim it’s the word of one student against the other. Really? A teacher can’t see when a student is obviously afraid and depressed enough to take their own lives? Especially when that student begs for help? Okay, so what proof do we need? Video? Okay, parents, arm your kids with cameras from now on.

We adults seem to keep thinking that bullying is a part of growing up but think about the facts for a second. If you went to work and were pushed around, beat up, called names, constantly, would you work there for long? What if your lunch or your money was taken from you daily by your co-workers? What if nasty pictures were posted all over the office? What if your co-workers spread vicious gossip on the company website? Would your bosses put up with that for long? Would they tell you that they couldn’t prove harassment was happening? Would they say it’s your word against someone else’s?

We have laws protecting adults from such activities but nothing protecting teens. If an adult were to commit suicide because they had to face the sheer harassment that teens do, someone would be held accountable by law. Companies and colleges have very clear harassment clauses and make the penalties for such behaviour very clear. Why are there not the same rules and regulations available for kids? Is it so unreasonable to get Alberta Education to create a harassment policy that is clear with clear consequences? Why aren’t police involved when it  comes to light that these kids commit suicide from harassment. As an adult, the law is on my side. Why not the same for kids?

300 suicides per year in Canada is 300 too many. Please. If you want to do something then speak up. Spread this blog. Spread Rick Mercer’s message. Write to government officials. Tell schools and school authorities that it is time to make this stop.

A child shouldn’t have to die to be heard.

300 children shouldn’t have to be subjected to fear, depression, ostrasization, loneliness because they’re different.

300 dead children means 300 torn families and lives affected.

300 too many.

What? Caring Means Work?

I came across this story this morning and was appalled. Not by RBC, although their behaviour was somewhat negligent, but by the family. It’s not until the money is gone that they get upset. Oh they probably felt real involved when they brought her over for Christmas and Easter. Thanksgiving’s always a treat but the rest of the year? Well, they had other things to do no doubt.

Before I get on my high horse and start ranting, let’s look at the situation. Her neighbour was able to move in, rent free, without the family raising so much as an eyebrow. Her neighbour was able to move in her son and son’s girlfriend, also rent free, without even a question. The family never questioned any of this. Not once did they say “Mom? Why are these people living with you?” The neighbour was then able to go to the bank on a regular basis and make regular withdrawals. Here’s my question; why wasn’t the family keeping an eye on that account to make sure that Mom (or Grandma) was paying her bills, etc. How was the neighbour able to make these withdrawals without the family asking a single question? Ever?

So the neighbour goes through the money. A fair chunk of change the kids were no doubt relying on getting when Mom kicked the bucket. $82,000. Now the bank calls the family because the account is dry and things are bouncing. Now the family gets upset and an investigation is started. Now? After the money is gone?

Okay so here’s the rant; where the hell was the family before the money was gone? At some point someone had to go over to Mom’s and see that she wasn’t being cared for. Maybe dishes weren’t done? House was a mess? Something? Here’s an idea; ask Mom how things are. Just because she’s elderly doesn’t mean she’s stupid. She probably knew her account was being bled dry and didn’t know what to do about it. The elderly are easy victims because they often feel isolated and don’t know where to turn for help.

All that takes work, though. The elderly need help in their day to day lives and it should be the responsibility of their families to do the work of caring for them. This does not necessarily mean moving in and cleaning up after them. However, it does mean being involved in their lives. If they live in a care facility it means talking with staff on a regular basis. It means checking their bank accounts to ensure all is in order. In some cases it may mean paying their bills for them and ensuring they have spending money if required. It means actually sitting down and talking with the elderly person and finding out how they feel about their lives and listening.

I am angry at this family. They expected a stranger to do what they should have been doing all along and only get angry when their inheritance is gone. In my eyes they’re just as guilty as the neighbour.

The Responsibility of the Freedom of Choice

I have never had children by choice. I’m not much of a mommy person and pregnancy kind of freaks me out (more on that on another blog). More to the point, I’ve never had men stick around in my life long enough to become daddies to any mini-mes I may have. I believe that men do have a responsibility to the children they bring in this world, but back in the 80s, when I would have been having children, it was a very different reality. I made the decision not to have any children unless I could adequately provide for them as a single mother with no help from the father.

Let me explain. If I’d had children and the father stuck around and was a good daddy, that’s great but anything could happen. Cancer, death, abduction by aliens, anything. For any number of reasons the father might be removed from the picture and, as the mother, it was up to me to provide for my child alone. I never felt like I could do that.

In 1988, the abortion laws in Canada were deemed unconstitutional and they were struck down in R. v. Morgentaler thus allowing women to terminate pregnancies with greater freedom. A woman does not have to consult the father or even let him know she is getting one. She can simply terminate the pregnancy and be on her way. I am in full support of allowing women to have the freedom to choose what happens with their bodies. I think that allowing women to terminate pregnancies without fear of reprisal is important. I do not agree with the pro-lifers who say that a woman has to carry a child through to delivery. However, women, freedom comes with a price.

If women want the freedom to terminate their pregnancies then they must take responsibility for those pregnancies. It is not viable to put all the responsibility on men. How many times has the line “he got her pregnant” been uttered? Why isn’t it, “they got her pregnant”? Women, you want the freedom to choose over your own bodies, well fine. The choice starts long before you ever walk into the clinic.

Personally, I am tired of women repeatedly having babies and  then society beating up the men for it. I know of women whose chosen partner has multiple children in the world (one man had fathered 10 children) and having more children with that man. In these cases the men have proven they’re not responsible and aren’t going to be a father to yet another brood of children. Don’t believe me?  Go talk to their babies’ mamas. Yet, in some sort of reproduction frenzy, these women will have multiple children with them then act surprised when he takes off to spread his seed elsewhere. Wake up, ladies, this wasn’t a shock to anyone but you.

Then what do the majority of these women do? They need to provide for their children, right? So, off to the welfare offices where you and I get to pay for these children. Wait a minute. I said I didn’t want children and now I have to pay for someone else’s child because they’re too stupid to take birth control or use a condom? How is that fair?

Women, if you want the freedom of choice for your bodies without the fathers being able to have any say, then you have to take responsibility for that freedom. If you bring a child into this world, understand that anything can happen to make you a single parent. Before you get pregnant ask yourself; am I prepared to raise this child as a single mother emotionally, psychologically and financially (physically)? If the answer is no or hemming and hawing, use a condom or get on birth control. There are far too many children brought into the world where the parents are unable to care for them. Don’t shuffle the blame off to the men. You wanted autonomy over your body, you got it.